Fear of the dark is one of the most common childhood fears. Monsters under the bed, shadows on the wall, frightening sounds – children's fantasy can populate a dark room with a variety of horrors. This fear is quite normal for a certain age (usually the peak occurs at 3-7 years old), but it causes a lot of anxiety for both the child and the parents. How can you help your child overcome this fear?
It is important to understand that for a child, his fear is real. Brushing off, shaming, or punishing for being afraid of the dark is not an option. It is necessary to show patience, understanding and help the baby feel safe.
Understanding and acceptance: the first step to victory
The most important thing is to let your child know that you can hear him and take his fears seriously. Don't make fun of his fear, even if it seems irrational to you. Tell him that you understand that he may be scared, and that you are there to help.
Talk to your child about what exactly he is afraid of in the dark. Sometimes, simply speaking out fear already reduces its intensity. Perhaps the fear has a specific reason – a scary cartoon, a loud sound at night. Understanding the source will help you find a solution. It is important to create an atmosphere of trust so that the child is not afraid to share his feelings.
Creating a safe space: light and rituals
The darkness scares you with the unknown. Simple techniques will help to make it less scary.:
- Night light. The soft, dim light of the night light will help the child to see the outlines of the room and feel calmer. Choose a night light with your child, let it be his "protector". You can use lamps with a projection of the starry sky or models with adjustable brightness.
- The door is open. Leave the door to the nursery ajar so that the child hears sounds from other rooms and does not feel isolated. The light from the hallway will also add a sense of security.
- Bedtime rituals. Create calm, predictable bedtime rituals: reading a good fairy tale, a lullaby, hugging, and quiet conversation. This helps the child to relax and tune in to rest. Avoid active games and watching exciting cartoons before going to bed.
- "Weapons" against monsters. You can come up with a "magic remedy" for fears – for example, "monster spray" (a bottle of plain water), a favorite protective toy that will "protect" the baby's sleep. These are playful methods, but they often work well with preschoolers.
The goal is not to remove the darkness completely, but to make it less frightening and associate sleep time with safety and comfort.
Developing courage: games and fairy tale therapy
You can also help your child overcome fear in a playful way during the day.
- Playing in the dark. Play hide-and-seek at dusk, search for "treasures" with a flashlight in a darkened room, arrange a shadow theater. It is important that these games are fun and take place in the presence of an adult, creating positive associations with darkness.
- Fairy tale therapy. Invent or read fairy tales where the main character bravely overcomes the fear of darkness or defeats imaginary monsters. Discuss with your child how the hero coped with fear.
- Drawing fear. Invite the child to draw his fear. Then you can "win" this drawing: draw funny details to the fear, tear it up or burn it (under the supervision of an adult).
These methods help the child to "work out" fear in a safe environment, to feel stronger and more confident.
Patience and love
Overcoming the fear of the dark is a process that can take time. Don't expect instant results. The main thing is your support, patience and love.
Be there when the child is scared, soothe, hug. Show by your example a calm attitude towards the dark. Gradually, feeling your support and confidence, the baby will learn to cope with his fears and will fall asleep peacefully. If the fear is very strong, obsessive and interferes with the normal life of the child, it is worth seeking advice from a child psychologist.